Friday, April 15, 2005

today i'm half-empty

When you're little and something goes wrong that you don't understand, like the neighbor kid got a new puppy and you didn't, or your friend down the street won't share her new toys, you cry and say, “it's not fair.” And then your parents look at you and tell you, “life's not fair.” And you mope and think that it should be.

Then you get older and accept that fact that life's not fair. Innocent people are dying in war-torn countries. Children are starving in Africa. Tsunamis kill hundreds of thousands of unsuspecting people in a split second. But the unfairness is still a bit removed. Sure shitty things happen. You get in car accidents. You have to have shoulder surgery. Maybe you lose your job. Grandparents die. But you get over it. All those things are somewhat expected. The completely unfair aspect of life is not impacting you directly.

But then all of a sudden, something comes straight out of the blue and smacks you right in the face. Life's not fair, buddy. And there's nothing you can do about it. I look around at the people that I love and realize just how fragile some of them are. I wish I could reach out and protect everyone and make everything right again.. But I can't. And now I'm left feeling helpless and empty.

3 comments:

Merce said...

Shit, what happened? Is everything alright? Or are you just feeling blue? The world does weigh heavily sometimes...

Ande said...

Hey, yeah. You sound sad. Did something happen? Call me we need to get together. I love you.

mandy said...

I love you guys too. I got some bad news from southern cal on Thursday that really freaked me out and I needed to get some things off my chest. I'm okay though. Just a little shaken.